More To Life Than Shoes

In the first of a series of articles from the MoreToLifeThanShoes coaches, Mum’s Mentor Susie Kendall shares her Top Five Tips on getting your confidence back after a career break

Be sure that whatever work you are going back to, it is work that really appeals to you.

If you have passion in your belly, you can’t go wrong. If you’re nervous about the job or you’re not really that into it at all, it will be much harder to muster the confidence you need.

If you’ve been really enjoying your career break, and are returning now because you have to, after maternity leave for example, it is even more important to enjoy what you do. You don’t want to be feeling resentful of how you are spending your day at work compared with what you were doing before.

Be proud of what you achieved during your career break.

Don’t view it as ‘wasted time’ or assume that you’ve fallen behind on the career ladder. Life is not just about work and what we do to earn money is not the whole person. You may have had a baby, or done some volunteer work. Maybe you were made redundant and did some travelling. Whatever you experienced during your career break – it was just that – an experience. Make sure you value and appreciate it.

Any potential employer who asks the question ‘I see a gap in your CV – tell me what you’ve been doing’ will be attracted to someone who can respond confidently and enthusiastically about how they have spent the time, and how they have benefited personally. There is no need to assume that you are being tested or that you need to defend your reasons for being out of the workplace. Make sure you rehearse your response.

Make a list of all the things you did for the first time during your break. Include everything. Embarking on a solo trip to another country, having a baby, caring for someone, taking up a new form of exercise, organising social events, dealing with redundancy, or just simply filling a day with no plans at the outset – that is very hard in itself for a lot of busy people!

Then highlight the things that were scary or difficult and the skills you used to deal with them. Think about how you went about getting over your fear and achieving what you did, however insignificant you think it might be. What skills did you need – courage, empathy, perseverance, resilience, optimism, good organisation, physical endurance, diplomacy? And what was the outcome? How did it feel? This will really highlight how you’ve grown during the break, and the personal benefits to you.

Think of this next move as a stepping stone.

If you really can’t face going back to a role as stressful and ‘high-powered’ as the one you were doing before your break, don’t. No longer do we embark on ‘a job for life’. It is more like ‘a life of jobs’. Depending no how long your break was, and how you are feeling about your return, think seriously about the kind of life-style that you want in the short term.

If you want to ease yourself back into the world of work gently, with regular hours and less responsibility, then make sure you choose a role that will allow you to do that. Once you are back on your feet, wait for the time to feel right to think about the next move.

Remember - it’s all about YOU

Confidence comes from knowing yourself and making good decisions based on that knowledge. Think about what you really want at this stage in your life and forget about what everyone else might think. I always admire people who appear to be happy in their jobs a lot more than those who have an impressive business card but who are clearly miserable.

Mum of three Louise Marley is the co-founder of Beauty Connection, specialists in lovely smellies for the home. She told us how her passion for business at a young age led to setting up her own company.

Louise Marley runs the successful fragrance company Beauty Connection, and she told us about her journey to becoming her own boss. Louise always knew that she wanted to run her own business. “I come from a family of entrepreneurs. My father ran a very successful business and I was encouraged from an early age to think like an entrepreneur.” And Louise certainly started out on her journey early! “I was twelve when I set up my first business with my sister – buying wild welsh ponies, breaking them, competing with them and then selling for a profit. We loved that feeling of achievement doing a job we both loved, training ponies that went on to become some other little girl’s dream.”

But once she’d left school, Louise decided that she needed more experience before diving in at the deep end and starting her own business full time. “Business is in my blood and I always knew I wanted my own company. I decided to work towards that, studying for a BA in Business Studies, then working for five years to gain valuable experience with blue-chip companies including St Ivel & Marks & Spencers.”

Louise has always been very clear on her ambitions and how to achieve them. “I have always had an overall plan for my journey in my head, so that when it comes to a big decision or change, I know I’m heading in the right direction. I wanted to be there for my children when they were young, so I set up a marketing consultancy for seven years so I was working for myself.”

Being her own boss suited Louise, but it wasn’t until she felt the time was right that she decided to start her own business. "When the kids were older I decided to take the big plunge and launched Beauty Connection, and I’ve been paddling my own canoe ever since.”

Louise’s business idea was born out of a passion for the power of the sense of smell! “My dream was to provide people with products and experiences that would enhance their life and living space, even if only in a small way. The sense of smell is our most powerful sense, and it can instantly influence our emotions. Using natural fragrances at home can really boost your well-being. The world’s a stressful place, and creating your own oasis of calm at home can make you feel safe and relaxed. Scenting your home and zoning your living space into relaxing, energizing, reflective areas can really benefit you and your family. So I set up Beauty Connection, selling beautiful scented candles and other fragrance products – a little bit of luxury at an affordable price.”

Running a business at the same time as raising her kids has not always been plain sailing for Louise. “I’m a mum of three, all aged between fifteen and twenty. Surviving their teenage years deserves a medal in itself. My kids are my best critics – or as they say, they help keep it real! My dream has always been to run my own life, balancing my commitments as a businesswomen, mum and wife. Now the children are older I find it difficult to remember how I ever got through all the demands made on me – particularly in the holidays or when they needed me because they were ill or just wanted a proud parent on the side lines. I did it with fantastically supportive husband, parents, in-laws, friends and children with a sense of humour and a sense of independence.”

Louise’s advice for other mums thinking of starting their own businesses is simple:

• Make sure it is your dream and not someone else’s.
• Be prepared for hard work and little sleep - particularly in the early days.
• Keep calm and don’t panic – nothing is ever insurmountable.
• Rely on friends and family – if people are prepared to give you a shoulder to lean on make sure you lean on it!
• Believe in what you do and be proud of your business, your staff and of course your products or services!
• Pick your staff with care they are your greatest asset and they will make the difference.
• Smile and be pleasant – getting on with people helps.
• Be flexible and be prepared to compromise.

Beauty Connection products can be viewed at www.acassa.co.uk.